Thinking like a Theist.

This is a little game I dreamt up. It’s called “Thinking like a Theist.”

Here are the rules. Pick a belief from group A. Pick an observation from group B. Then add any detail you want to rationalize them as B proves A.

Group A (belief)

Forrest Pixie. God. Giants. Santa Claus. Superman. Paris Hilton is a role model. Ice cream tastes bad. Driving drunk is okay if you sing Jewel songs. The world is only 6000 years old. Mt Rainier is taller than Mt Everest. Spitting on open wounds speeds healing. People go to Hooters for the wings. Helicopters can fly without the main rotor. The Browns won the Super Bowl.

Group B

Trump is president. Trees are green. The words “Satan” and “Santa” have the same letters. The penis fits in the vagina. 911 is the emergency number, and 9/11 was an emergency day. Michelangelo was a Christian. Drinking rat poison can kill you. Staring at the sun hurts your eyes. Cars have 4 wheels. Root beer is not beer. Airline security has become stricter in the last 60 years.

Try it out! Start with a B item, and arrive at an A conclusion. All it takes is a little imagination. Can you do it?

Imagine I up the game a bit. Imagine I put up $1000, give you a week, and your argument needs to be logically consistent. Can you still do it? I bet you can! Takes a bit more time, a more robust backstory needs to be assumed, but it’s totally possible.

Try this exercise a dozen times, each time change up your group A and B. It becomes a pretty fun game, right?

>>Now for the final and most depressing part of the game.<<

Pick one item from group A, and stick with that one and that one only. Play the game by changing group B items only. Write down every B item, and rationalize to your chosen A. Once written down, prosthletyze your chosen A, hate people that don’t choose your A, and tell your children they will be tormented forever if they don’t believe in your A.

If you do this, you win the game. You are now thinking like a theist.

I think it’s a stupid game.

The Spartan Atheist


17 thoughts on “Thinking like a Theist.

  1. Clever! I thought of a game called “I’m Offended!” The aim of the game is to pick something completely innocuous or uncontroversial, then come up with some conceivable reason why you would be offended by it! You get cards, or each team does, it can be multiple teams or two, and are presented with one uncontroversial thing. The team with the most clever answer for why they’re offended wins a point! Many religious zealots could be very good at that, but then again, saying “because God said so” gets old real fast…. 😉

    Liked by 5 people

    1. I find that game offensive.

      Liked by 2 people

      1. There’s an ancient game called “Seeing is believing”.
        At dawn the sun rises in the east and sets in the west and we’re not aware of the Earth travelling as we revolve and evolve around the sun.

        I watched a Horizon program on BBC2 on 16.05.17 called Strange Signals From Outer Space:
        TV blurb: Documentary about Scientists and their search for extra-terrestrial life, such as husband-and-wife team Duncan Lorimer and Maura McLaughlin, who discovered a signal from space known as a fast radio burst, and the Green Bank Telescope searching for radio signals from a star so mysterious some believe it could be a vast energy collector built by advanced aliens.
        They know that in that vast Cosmos lies the answers to our past and our surviving the future.
        It is their ability to be able to suspect & accept evidence of possible, probable advanced aliens collecting data on us, than call them celestial Beings/Deity, that absolutely baffles me.
        In a children’s space book I came across a blurb that stated ‘DID YOU KNOW?’ Many of the elements that make up the human body were forged in supernovae, (our Earth, berth, birthday suits?)
        I Googled pictures of our Milky Way planet and there was one with an arrow pointing to somewhere on it’s outskirts and above it were the words ‘You are here’.
        And, obviously, the word did come first, and I don’t mean the written one.
        A friendly Sibyl X


  2. I’m stumped as of now to come up with any clever B’s for any of the A’s except for that easy Santa one…

    Satan exists,
    Satan and Santa have the same letters,
    Anything with the same letters must be the two form of the same thing,
    Ergo, Santa exists.

    Not the most logically coherent, but then again, are they??? 😉 They “cheat” at this game all the time! Perhaps my more rational, logical brain is having trouble coming up with bogusness! “Does not compute…” 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I am not Religious. I have never been indoctrinated into any cult. And, I can’t stand Religious DOGMA being rammed down my throat.
    So, I thought it would be interesting to play your game until I came to the part where I’d have to become one of Judas’s Tyrannical Usurpers. That’s not theism, but it is all part of a real live game of Chess. The Devil can always be found in the detail.

    Sibyl X


    1. I feel the need to add a caution so I’ve added it here.
      You seem to be singling out Christians (who have been Crucified) to the delight of others, who are not, that follow you.
      An Atheist simply doesn’t believe in God.

      Sibyl X


      1. Thanks, sibyltowers. I single out Christians most frequently because that is the predominant religion in this country, and it therefore has an affect on me directly. I speak of all the religions as fake in this blog, but I write from my experiences.


  4. Please allow me to add a little something here regarding your game and the real live game of Chess, seeing as Nuclear Weapon’s Armageddon looms near.

    First of all I’ll tell you something about XX & XY multi-faceted, gifted people.
    We are all the first X. There are masculine Xs and feminine Xs and androgynous Xs.
    The second X provides a maiden’s womb-body etc. and nurturing Romantic feelings.
    The android animalistic Y provides our males with a fighting chance of surviving against one dimensional YY Murderers & INSANE Terrorists, on this Planet of Darwinian Apes . . .

    Regarding Benevolent GOD-father Christ-mas’ Crucified, born again X Mass Trees,
    He had to lock horns to the Death with His Disease riddled, Jealous, Bitter etc. Prodigal son called Satan, then Satan’s Supernova HELL broke loose with it’s Sperm Entities Germ WARFARE . . .

    With an almighty BANG the first Cosmic wormhole was forged. It was an escape route from HELL’s Abyss, the biggest blackhole that ever existed. Only it’s little Icy Plutonic core remains.

    Many of us suffer from unconscious Terrors, Nightmares, Psychosis etc. until eventually we self destruct.
    I’m talking about the Good-Guys. I’m not including their Girls because if Males were kind, Strong and loving like they once were . . .
    When all’s said and done we are all Brothers & Sisters ingroups & inlaws?

    Sibyl X


    1. PS
      I thought you sounded wistful when you wrote about comic heroes not being real.

      The Weaver of the World Wide Web of life,
      who spins folk yarns with coded textures bright
      that were meant through touch, sight, smell & sound
      to connect the fibres to our senses, now Profound,
      had to cut His own Clotho to suit His lost Kin
      so that those in touch with the Spirits could begin
      to redress each seem of needling dread
      by picking up dropped chain-links and following Life’s thread.
      So goodbye atrophy, Lachesis’ Destinies have begun
      on behalf of Atropose’s Superhero, COSMIC SUPERMAN

      Only one survived life’s dying ember,
      when fanned new circles of life remember.
      Someone must have lived to see
      Myths’ nightmares, Olympian memories
      and His name was JOHN/Baldur . . .

      Yours in all sincerity
      Sibyl X


      1. PPS
        One has to have a sense of the ridiculous to crack Symbolic & Language codes.
        There’s nuggets of Truth in everything.

        Samson’s power wasn’t really in his hair,
        deciphering that message means it’s passed on to each heir.

        Android gorilla Adam = ADam’s males & wombmales
        Hominoid bonobos Eve = The Eve before Nativities’ Sentient Christ-mass Beings ETC.

        Because of the Atrocities and hardships etc. still going on, in the eyes of Peaceful, SENTIENT, Family oriented Hue-Main BEINGS, there’s nothing illogical about not believing in God, never mind a Loving GOD. ‘Hell NO?’ ”HELL KNOW!”

        Sibyl X


      2. I think it’s only fair to add
        You try proving immortality while being in mortal form and Excruciating AGONY,
        along with your Innocent ingroup, for being a Heretic.
        Do as you would be done by
        many times back-stabbed, Defeat.
        Turn the other cheek, and repeat, and repeat,
        Futility as RAGE replaces greet.
        Did Heaven curse them? Too effin right.
        But actions speak louder than words, don’t they frustrated atheists?
        There’s a place for everything, including Pluto.

        That’s not a threat dear Friends, it’s just an explanation.
        Sibyl X


      3. Do as you would be done by grew
        into an XMass wish coming True.
        Planetary systems know what to do
        to give each what each gave, Mind Mapping?
        Right is Might, isn’t it?

        The RACE is to find CURES
        for what Mentally & Physically Ails US.
        Gs-US Christ! We have to WIN.
        Sibyl X


      4. Here’s another Reincarnation:
        ‘ECCE HOMO’ Latin!


      5. I’m sorry, but I’m so frustrated with it all that I can’t help adding:
        I’ve seen it on church posters that HIS second coming is imminent?
        (Maybe only then will they take HIM off the effin Cross.)
        HE’S already done that, and this time HE was relying on SCIENCE . . .
        All I can gently say is, True Gentle Christian’s are stuck in a Time-Warp, with their Beloved Son God on an effin Judas cross, and the subsequent Excommunication, and Burning at the stake, of HIS SIBYLLINE PSYCHICS who were NEVER their Enemy.
        So, The SHOW & Tell has gone on, and on, and on, right back to Jurassic Park ETC.
        Thank GOD for the Mighty Multi-Talented, TECHNICOLOURED Hebrews and Shrewd Jews.
        Sibyl X


      6. First, I’d like to thank you for allowing me to join in conversations.
        Just to elaborate on a clue I was given, thanks to Disney’s versions of gothic horror Grimm Fairy Tales, that have a happy ending.

        Samson’s power wasn’t really in his hair.
        Rapunzel’s story showed a gene had blossomed in an heir.
        Delilah Gothal’s gall rose and blossomed in her ire.
        She became a crone that died when the shard sliced off heir’s hair.
        And Rapunzel didn’t lose her powers that came from her heart.

        A Warrior’s coat of armour shields a heart grown cold,
        then Loving wields a mortal blow to wounds that bled,
        and wrapped around his heart instead.


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